


Roadie

by darriness



Series: Roadie [1]
Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-12
Updated: 2019-11-12
Packaged: 2021-01-29 10:09:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21408445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darriness/pseuds/darriness
Summary: Blaine Anderson is the lead singer of one of the most popular bands in the United States. His life is chaotic but he loves it. One day, a new sound engineer joins the tour and turns Blaine's already chaotic life upside down.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Series: Roadie [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1559239
Comments: 22
Kudos: 119





	Roadie

**Author's Note:**

> This idea came to me this past Saturday and would not let me go. So I wrote it! I hope you enjoy it (I personally love it lol). I thought about keeping this until the Glee Potluck thing but I was too excited. Thanks as always to my beta @darrenismydarcy. Enjoy!

Blaine Anderson takes a deep breath and leans his head back against the cement wall behind him. He closes his eyes, brings his hands up to grab at the ends of the towel draped around his neck, and sighs out his next breath - quieting his body, quieting his mind, and letting his heart rate return to normal.

There is noise all around him but he doesn’t really hear it. It’s white noise on the periphery of his consciousness. He could go somewhere more quiet but he prefers to have this moment with others around. Everyone around him knows at this point to leave him alone anyway.

Perks of being the lead vocalist of one of America’s current hottest bands.

The Warblers formed the year after Blaine graduated high school. They had ‘borrowed’ the name from their high school glee club and spent four years playing seedy bars and bar mitzvahs before the right guy came to one of those seedy clubs and suddenly they were playing stadiums and dodging screaming girls.

Blaine has loved every minute of the last five years (really the last nine years but is he happy to no longer be living in a shoe box and eating cereal for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Of course). He’s enjoyed the touring and recording and meeting fans and doing talk shows and he’s excited to see what the future holds. But sometimes, okay every time, after a show, he needs a few moments to recentre himself or fear losing himself.

He’s almost got his heart rate back down when he hears yelling. His eyebrows furrow over his still closed eyes. There’s usually no yelling backstage. Actually, he’s not sure he’s ever heard yelling.

“Yeah, well, you can go fuck yourself!” Blaine hears being screamed from down the hall.

Blaine picks his head up and blinks his eyes open, searching for the source of the shouting. The usual hum of the backstage hallway has gone quiet as every occupant turns to look at the two men yelling - well one man is screaming, the other is gesturing for security.

“I have been here for three years and you’re going to let me go? For what?! You haven’t given me a single credible goddamn excuse!” 

Blaine wishes he could remember the name of the man currently disturbing his serenity. He knows he works in the sound department for the tour but his name is escaping Blaine. The man he’s spitting at is Alan Merce - The Warblers’ manager.

“Frank,” Alan says with forced calmness as they are approached by two security guards. Frank Lesser, that’s the sound technician’s name, Blaine’s brain provides, “we appreciate all you’ve done for us…”

Frank scoffs and raises the finger at Alan, then at the two security guards, and finally at the entire hallway as he spins and waves the finger aloft, “Good luck, assholes! I hope this all tanks!”

Blaine watches in stunned silence as Frank is led down the hallway and out a side door of the auditorium. Alan takes a rough breath, hands on his hips and shakes his head before looking down the hall toward where Blaine stands. There are more people in the vicinity but Blaine knows Alan is looking at him when he gives a resigned shrug before turning and heading back into the room he came from.

“Well, that’s one way to leave a job.” Blaine turns to find Wes Montgomery, the band’s keyboard player, smirking as he approaches.

Blaine sighs, “This tour was going really well.” He says and Wes nods, “And now we need a new sound engineer.”

“If the new guy makes us sound like crap, I’m suing Alan.” Jeff Sterling, the band’s drummer, says as he joins the group. 

Wes chuckles but Blaine rolls his eyes, “I’m sure the new guy will be awesome.”

Jeff slings an arm around Blaine’s shoulders, pulling him into a sideways hug, “Awww what would we do without our optimistic Blainers?”

Blaine laughs and shoves away from the taller man, “I have to make up for all of you pessimists.”

Jeff turns toward Wes with a shocked inhale, who laughs, “Us? Pessimists?”

Blaine smirks, “Come on. I need a bed and we need to get on the road.” He gestures down the hall with his head toward the exit and the trio makes their way outside - onward to another city and another show.

— — —

Blaine wakes up to bright sun in his eyes the next morning. He squeezes his eyes shut further and groans. He enjoys the warmth the sun brings but could do without the glare. Even the tinted windows of the bus aren’t helping block it out.

He only has a moment to adjust before a pillow is tossed at his head, “Get up!” Jeff shouts jubilantly and Blaine groans again, “We’ve got places to go and things to see!”

“We’ve got a venue to go to and that same venue to see.” Nick Duval comments dryly, and when Blaine opens his eyes finally, he can see the brunette sitting on the bed across from Blaine’s, sitting sideways and strumming his guitar. 

“Where are we again?” David Thompson, the band’s bassist, croaks from his own bed further down the bus.

“Wes?” Nick asks, not looking up from his magazine.

“Milwaukee.” Wes answers around a yawn. He’s always the only one to know where they are.

There’s a smattering of groans and protests as the rest of the men realize how cold it’s going to be outside the bus on a January morning in Milwaukee, but Blaine just stretches lazily and goes over the itinerary for the day.

Sound check, press conference, radio interview, meet and greet, concert, bus to the next city.

Not overly different from how he spends most of his days on tour. There’s comfort in routine, even despite the craziness that is that routine itself for Blaine.

He closes his eyes for a few stolen moments, knowing he’ll have to get up and shower in a minute or two so that when he exits the bus to find at least a handful of fans hanging around it in hopes of meeting the band and getting a few moments of their time, he won’t look like he just stuck his finger in an electrical socket. He hears the other men start to shuffle around more and mentally goes through his itinerary one more time before joining them.

— — —

“I don’t understand how your selfie game is so strong.” Jeff is saying as he and Blaine enter the venue an hour later. There had been a group of fans waiting for them and while Blaine would sometimes like to not have to think about what he looks like when walking from the bus to the venue, he is fully aware that making fans feel special and valued is a part of his job. He prides himself on doing a good job at that, “I mean I have been trying to learn from you for years and mine are always blurry or I look like a crazy person.”

Blaine laughs as he pulls open the door to the main stage area and holds it open for Jeff to walk through first with a nod of thanks, “Steady hands.” He says as explanation.

Jeff scoffs, good naturedly, and then jogs off to hug Nick from behind as the other man stands talking to their lightning engineer, Theresa. He leaves a smacking kiss on Nick’s cheek who laughs fondly and reaches back to ruffle Jeff’s hair.

Blaine smiles at the interaction even though he feels slightly jealous. He misses the companionship a relationship brings. He tries not to think about how long it’s been since he was in a relationship because it just makes the ache a little worse to put a number on it. He just doesn’t have the time, energy, or frankly the trust needed to be in a relationship considering what he does for a living. Nick and Jeff were lucky to find love in each other.

“Anderson, come here!” Blaine turns to see Alan gesturing him over to where he stands with a group of people.

Most of the people are those Blaine recognizes and can name - crew from the tour that do various important jobs to make sure the five of them look good on stage. Blaine makes his way over and smiles at Alan and the others in the small circle they’ve created before his eyes fall on a new face.

The face isn’t looking directly at him, it’s looking back and forth between a sound board and Clark, the tour’s stage manager, but Blaine finds himself instantly distracted by it. The face is all sharp angles and smooth skin. It’s graceful pink lips and crystal clear blue eyes. It’s chestnut brown hair swooped high off the forehead. It’s...breathtaking.

It’s not until Alan waves in Blaine’s face that Blaine realizes the other man has been speaking and Blaine hasn’t been paying attention. He shakes his head and turns away from the face to look at their manager, “Sorry, what was that?”

Alan quirks an eyebrow at him, “You feeling okay, Anderson?” Blaine nods and Alan takes a deep breath of relief before gesturing in the face’s direction, “I just wanted you to meet our new sound engineer. He’s the best in the business. We’re lucky to have him. Kurt!” He calls across the circle and for the first time the face, Kurt, turns directly toward Blaine. The full on frontal version is just as, if not more, breathtaking, “Come meet our lead singer!”

The neutral, pleasant expression on Kurt’s face morphs quickly into something harder when his eyes land on Blaine. Blaine is taken aback by the heat of Kurt’s glare and he has to force himself away from looking around to see if something else could be causing Kurt to look like that. They’ve never even met, why does Kurt seem angry with Blaine?

“It’s...nice to meet you. I’m Blaine.” Blaine says, extending his hand with as much of a genuine, open smile as he can manage.

Kurt walks the few steps over to him and looks down at his hand with a slightly quirked eyebrow. Blaine has a moment of thinking that Kurt won’t take the hand before the other man reaches his hand forward and shakes Blaine’s with a smooth but cold two pumps. Blaine’s never described a hand shake as cold but this one definitely was.

“Charmed.” Kurt says with a smile that feels the opposite of warm (or charmed) before he’s turning around to walk back to the sound board and Clark.

Alan claps Blaine on the back before moving to deal with something else without another thought. It’s clear he either didn’t notice the cold way Kurt addressed Blaine or didn’t care. Either is possible.

Blaine stays rooted to the spot for a few more seconds as he stares at Kurt’s back. His routine morning has hit an unexpected bump. There are bumps he can anticipate, roll with easily because he’d almost known they’d come, this was not one of them.

— — —

Blaine has to admit that Kurt is amazing at his job. Not that Frank hadn’t been wonderful, but Kurt is next level. Blaine doesn’t think he’s ever sounded as good as he does over the next week, and even the cellphone videos he finds online, with their limited audio capability, prove that Kurt has a fantastic ear for acoustics. 

What Blaine doesn’t understand is why Kurt seems to hate him. Blaine is nothing but nice to the other man over the week, thanking him for a great job and trying to engage him in conversation, but Kurt rebuffs him every time. He’s always professional and not overtly mean or rude, he’s just….dissmissive is the only word Blaine can label Kurt’s behaviour with. Blaine has watched Kurt’s interactions with the other members of the band or crew, and while he isn’t the most bubbly of personalities, he seems a lot more friendly with them than he is with Blaine.

Blaine wants to let it go. He has more important things to worry about than whether or not the new sound engineer likes him, but for some reason he can’t stop thinking about it. Okay it’s not just for ‘some reason’. Blaine knows what the reason, or rather reasons, are. 

One, Blaine is used to being liked by everyone. He’s not arrogant about it but he’s noticed since he was young that people tend to gravitate towards him, and he can count on one hand the number of true fights he’s had over his lifetime (he still occasionally thinks about the time in third grade when his friend had thought Blaine had stolen his eraser, which he hadn’t, and stopped being friends with him for a full week). And two, well, Kurt’s really good looking. Blaine isn’t above saying he’s lusting, hard, after the other man (which is made all the more confusing by Kurt’s apparent dislike of him).

“I don’t know what to do.” Blaine moans to Wes as they sit across from each other in the sitting room of Blaine’s hotel room in Minnesota. They finished their first show in the city a few hours ago and are enjoying the hotel room stay until their second show tomorrow. They’re a few beers in and Blaine has spilled his dueling desires to rip Kurt’s clothes off and yell at him for being a dick.

“You need to have sex.” Wes says. Blaine looks up, sharply, from where he’d laid his head back on the chair. Wes shakes his head and waves a hand as he finishes the sip he just took, “I don’t mean with Kurt.” He clarifies before shrugging, “Though, I mean, there’s no law against that.”

Blaine shakes his head, “He hates me. He’s not going to want to have sex with me. And I’m not even sure I’d really want to with how standoffish he’s been.”

Wes pouts thoughtfully, “He doesn’t hate you.” Blaine shrugs, unconvinced, “But what I mean is you need to get out and sleep with someone else. Scratch that itch. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

Blaine shifts uncomfortably. It has been a while. Not only since he’s been in a relationship but since he’s had sex. He does need to get back on the horse, so to speak, wants to get back out there, but he also realizes how difficult that task is in his position.

“I can’t just go out to a bar and find a willing partner.” He says, “Could you imagine the headline? ‘Warblers’ Blaine Anderson seen out trolling for a twink’.”

“I didn’t know you were in to twinks.” Wes comments and then laughs at Blaine’s exasperated face.

“You don’t get it.” Blaine sighs, “You have a lovely girlfriend waiting for you at home, or who even comes to some of the stops. You don’t have to worry about a potential partner’s motives or true intentions.”

Wes nods, letting his beer bottle dangle between his legs as he leans forward, “I get that but...sometimes sex is just sex. I bet you’d find more willing partners with no ulterior motives other than having an orgasm than those who were out to make a headline.”

Blaine shrugs again and leans his head back in his chair to look up at the ceiling. Wes is probably right but Blaine also knows he’s probably not going to go out and find a random partner for a night.

He wants more than that.

Blaine has a fitful sleep after Wes goes back to his own room, which means he’s less than chipper the following morning. He gets himself a large cup of coffee on the way to the venue, and while he would usually grab extras for anyone wanting, he leaves the coffee shop with only his own and wraps his gloved hands greedily around it and scowls down at the lid all the way to the venue.

“Everything okay, Blaine?” Charlie, his personal security guard, asks as he opens the door for Blaine to hop out outside the stage door to the venue.

“Yeah, fine. Just tired.” Blaine answers shortly. Charlie shrugs good naturedly and opens the door to the venue for Blaine to walk through first.

Blaine is glad he doesn’t run into any of his bandmates on his way to his dressing room. None of the crew members milling about backstage try to engage Blaine in conversation, his band mates would be a different story. He drops his jacket, hat, gloves, and bag with extra clothes onto the counter inside before grabbing his coffee and trudging his way to the main stage area for sound check.

“Hey Blaine!” Nick smiles, from where he’s sitting fiddling with his ear pieces on the steps to the stage, “Ready to make some fans’ days?”

Blaine blinks at him, uncomprehending. Nick quirks an eyebrow at him, “The contest to have fans watch our sound check?”

Blaine wants to bang his head against the wall. He’d completely forgotten about the contest (that had actually been his own idea). He barely has the energy or desire to get through a normal sound check, but to have fans present as well? 

“Great.” He answers with as much enthusiasm as he can muster before walking down the stage steps past Nick and over to the sound booth three quarters of the way down the floor.

He finds Kurt crouched down over a box of equipment, pulling pieces out to inspect before either putting them back or setting them on the ground next to his feet. He’s got a concentrated scowl on his face and Blaine uses the time before he announces his presence, or Kurt notices he’s there, to examine the gorgeous man in front of him.

“Morning.” He finally says and Kurt startles slightly before turning, still in his crouch.

He gives Blaine an unreadable expression before lifting his brows briefly and gesturing to the sound board, “Ears and mic are there.” He says simply and then turns back to the box he’d been shuffling through. Blaine rolls his eyes before grabbing the equipment from where Kurt told him it would be and stalking back toward the stage. 

How had he thought he was actually attracted to Kurt? Sure, Kurt is gorgeous but he’s also the most unapproachable and unfriendly person Blaine has ever met. It’s like talking to a brick wall. Blaine vows to get over the lust he feels for the other man. He can be just as aloof toward Kurt as the other man is toward him. They don’t have to be anything other than coworkers, they don’t even have to be acquaintances. Blaine is fine with that...well, he’ll work on being fine with that.

He finds out he’s got about fifteen minutes before the fifty people who won the contest will be there. He decides to spend that time alone with his coffee. If his band mates notice him acting differently, Blaine is thankful they don’t ask about it.

As the first fans start to filter into the floor area an excited buzz is immediately evident. Blaine throws his empty coffee out and shakes himself into his game face as he watches the members of the group enter. It’s a mixture of young children with their parents, 20/30 somethings (most dressed way more scantily then they probably should for the weather in Blaine’s opinion), and even a few probably in their 50s or 60s. The Warblers attract a wide range of fans with their mix of pop and acapella/acoustic tunes which is what makes them so marketable.

Blaine watches and listens as Alan greets the group as they settle on the floor space in front of the stage. He reminds them that this is sound check and not a full show and that there may be interruptions or mistakes as they work to make sure the sound is right.

Blaine figures the potential for error is small considering they just performed here last night, that this sound check is more a formality than truly a chance to figure out the acoustics of the space, but he appreciates Alan making that announcement. He also appreciates it when Alan reminds the fans to stay within the designated space and not wander. He can imagine finding at least one of them backstage or in their dressing rooms.

Alan turns to him and gives him a thumbs up before jumping down from the box he’d been standing on and briskly walking away to deal with something else. Blaine does a final adjustment to his ear pieces for comfort before bringing his microphone to his mouth.

He pauses for a second to allow Kurt the chance to make sure his mic is live before smiling at the crowd, “Welcome everyone!” There’s a few screams and claps, “We’re so glad to have you here to watch us stumble through making sure our sound works.” Laughter from the crowd as well as his band mates behind him, “We’re going to do a few songs for you. Enjoy!”

They start with one of their most popular songs. Blaine is more emotive then he usually is during sound check and interacts with the small crowd as they dance and sing along. He winks at a few and waves to the little girl who is bouncing up and down and waving to him from the front row. They finish the song without difficulty and as the crowd claps, he looks up at Kurt to find the man giving a thumbs up from the booth. He doesn’t look up from his concentrated scowl down at the sound board but the thumbs up is enough to let Blaine know everything went well.

They slide into one of their acapella songs, a dynamic, powerful ballad that even makes Blaine emotional every time he sings it. He watches as the crowd sways and the few couples in the crowd snuggle together at the touching, romantic lyrics.

He adjusts his ear pieces again but everything sounds fine. He can hear himself and his bandmates and nothing is amiss. They finish the song with a strong sustained note and Blaine smiles at the screams and clapping from the small crowd. Kurt once again gives him a thumbs up without looking up and Blaine nods to himself before smiling at the crowd. He may have been feeling grumpy before, but nothing brings him to life like performing in front of a crowd (no matter how big).

“All right, guys, we’ve got one more for you.” The crowd ‘aw’s’ and Blaine smiles, “Sorry! But we’ll see you for the show tonight, right?” The crowd screams and cheers as Blaine cues his bandmates to start their last song for sound check.

It’s one of their more upbeat songs and Blaine bounces around the stage, interacting with the other men as he sings. He comes up behind Nick on the guitar and sings over his shoulder as Nick leans back into him slightly. He goes to stand on the platform in front of Jeff’s drums and imitates David’s bass playing during a musical break.

He’s just getting into the bridge of the song when his mic suddenly cuts off. The backing vocals remain but his voice is no longer projecting. He furrows his brow at his mic and shakes it quickly, hoping that will get it working again but it doesn’t help. Blaine starts to quietly panic. As much as the crowd is prepared for things to potentially go wrong, Blaine hates when things go wrong in front of fans. These people are paying for this experience, they should get a perfect mini-show, and Blaine doesn’t want to stop the song on a high to deal with his mic.

As he turns to look across the venue at Kurt, he hears Wes ask the small crowd to sing the next part with them. Blaine is immediately grateful for his friend. Nine years of a working relationship, and eleven years of friendship, means Wes knows what Blaine needs in this moment. He needs the show to go on.

Kurt hasn’t looked up from his soundboard. He’s twisting dials and moving sliders but keeps his head down and doesn’t once look up to make eye contact with Blaine.

Blaine feels his blood start to boil as he shakes his mic again and tries to sing into it. Still nothing. He gives up, with the mic and Kurt, and looks down at the side of the stage to find Molly holding a new mic out to him. He smiles gratefully and hands her his useless mic before grabbing the new one. When he lifts it to his mouth to continue the song, his voice rings out throughout the stadium. It’s not perfect, hasn’t been calibrated perfectly for his voice, but it’ll get him to the end of the song.

The entire moment feels like it lasted ten minutes to Blaine but when he picks the song back up he realizes it was maybe more like thirty seconds. He finishes the song to raucous applause from the small crowd and he smiles, waves, and thanks them for coming before they are being shuffled back out of the venue.

He keeps the smile and polite wave up until the last fan leaves before his face drops into an angry scowl and he stalks down the stage stairs and over to the sound booth.

“What happened?” He asks when he’s close enough.

Kurt finally, finally, looks up from the controls and give Blaine a passive shrug, “I don’t know. Your mic must have shorted.”

Blaine sees red. No apology, no remorse for an error that occured with the equipment he’s supposed to be in charge of. Nothing. Just the same aloof and dismissive tone and attitude as usual.

“Did you do it on purpose?” Blaine asks and he can tell he’s caught Kurt off guard when the other man’s eyes widen in surprise. Good.

“You can’t seriously be asking me that.” Kurt says.

Blaine wants to go on. He wants to yell and scream at Kurt for being gorgeous and sexy and RUDE. But he suddenly remembers where they are and that there are people around, people watching them.

He huffs an agitated breath and puts his hands on his hips, “Can we discuss this some place more private?”

Kurt’s eyes once again widen for a split second before the unreadable expression is back, “Fine. Lead the way.” He says with a gesture.

Blaine marches off in the direction of his dressing room and assumes Kurt follows even though he doesn’t look back to check. When he reaches the blue door with his name on it, he pushes inside and only then turns to see Kurt coming in after him, “Should I close the door?” Kurt asks.

Blaine rolls his eyes, “It wouldn’t be private if it were open.” He snarks and Kurt raises an eyebrow before closing the door softly.

He turns back to Blaine with an expectant expression, “So…” He says when Blaine doesn’t speak.

Blaine glares at him as he tries to think of what he wants to say. If he isn’t careful he’s going to blurt out something about how beautiful Kurt is and how angry that makes him but he has to remember this isn’t about that right now.

“So you didn’t make my mic cut out on purpose?” He asks, trying to keep his anger in check.

Kurt sits primly on the arm of the small couch in the room and crosses his arms, “Of course I didn’t. I’m good at my job. I don’t sabotage the mics of the performers I work with. Could you imagine the reputation that would give me? You are not that important to lose the reputation I’ve earned for myself.”

Blaine feels an unexpected sting at Kurt telling him how unimportant he is. He likes to think of himself as having high self-esteem. A throw away comment like that should mean nothing especially coming from someone like Kurt. But it does.

He crosses his arms tightly over his own chest, “Why do you hate me?” He asks.

Kurt quirks an eyebrow, “I don’t hate you.” He says, simply.

Blaine scoffs, “Please. You are the most dismissive person I’ve ever met, and while you aren’t Mr. Sunshine with everyone, it’s worse with me. I have been nothing but nice to you and you treat me like I’m nothing but an annoyance. It’s not right and it’s not fair. So I’ll ask you again, why do you hate me?” When he’s done his mini-rant, he’s out of breath and his hands are clenched at his sides.

Kurt regards him for a moment in silence. His eyes scan Blaine’s face and then slowly drop along his body and back up. Blaine almost squirms under the scrutiny. What is Kurt looking for?

Finally, after what feels like an insufferably long time to Blaine, Kurt sighs and drops his gaze, fiddling with a loose thread on the arm of the couch, “So, are we going to sleep together now or do you want to yell at me some more?”

Blaine chokes on his own spit. He sputters and coughs and tears make his vision swim. Through them he can see Kurt regarding him with the same neutral, unreadable expression that he usually does. Finally, he gets himself under control.

“What?” He asks for lack of anything better to say as he wipes under his eyes.

Kurt shrugs, “I mean, you’re welcome to keep yelling at me, it’s kind of hot, but if it’s all the same to you, I’d like to get naked and put my cock somewhere in your body.”

Blaine almost chokes again. He stares at Kurt wide eyed and Kurt just lifts his brows in question.

Does Blaine really want to have sex with Kurt right now? A quick catalogue of his body tells him it’s definitely willing and able, but nothing has been solved. Blaine is no closer to figuring out why Kurt treats him the way he does.

Blaine’s head is spinning from the abrupt shift from angry to turned on. Well, he’s still angry, but he’s now also very turned on and there isn’t enough blood in his body for both reactions. Slowly his hands unclench at his sides.

Kurt does a once over of his body again and smirks at what he’s looking at. Clearly he can tell that Blaine’s body is more than okay with Kurt’s suggestion.

“I won’t ask a third time.” Kurt finally says around his smirk.

And it’s that, the cocky tone and smirk, that causes Blaine to lose it. He’s in front of Kurt in a heartbeat and brings their lips together in a bruising kiss by pulling the back of Kurt’s neck. Kurt doesn’t seem surprised by the sudden movement and shifts into the kiss like he was the one who had initiated it.

Blaine moans into Kurt’s mouth at the feel of Kurt’s tongue against his. He knows it’s been a while but he has had no shortage of partners over the years. None of those kisses had felt like this.

The pair war for dominance in the kiss and Blaine would very much like to win, but when it becomes clear that Kurt isn’t backing down, Blaine’s body decides for him and he surrenders under Kurt’s mouth.

He can tell when Kurt feels the shift because suddenly Blaine is on his back on the couch and Kurt is over top of him. It hadn’t taken much to get Blaine in this position, just a gentle push against his hips. Kurt props himself on his elbow on the narrow couch near Blaine’s head but lets most of his weight settle along Blaine’s side. 

They kiss feverishly and Blaine claws at the hem of Kurt’s shirt, desperate to feel skin. Kurt pulls back just enough to tug his shirt off and then lifts Blaine’s shirt over his head in a less than graceful move, but it doesn’t matter as they go back to making out.

Blaine’s skin is on fire from the noises coming from Kurt. He’s groaning and moaning just as much as Blaine, but it’s the soft sighs he gives every once in a while that are making Blaine’s heart race.

They run their hands along the skin that is exposed (Blaine along Kurt’s back and chest, and Kurt along Blaine’s chest and stomach) and continue to kiss. They kiss for so long that Blaine gets to experience a multitude of different kisses from Kurt. They started with a forceful kiss but now there is a mixture of soft, nipping kisses, wet, tongue-filled kisses, and deep sucking kisses. All of them leave Blaine breathless and by how much Kurt is panting when he finally pulls away to kiss along Blaine’s jaw, it’s clear that Kurt is breathless too.

Blaine moves his neck to give Kurt more access and threads his hands into the back of Kurt’s hair to encourage the movement. Kurt drops his hand to the front of Blaine’s pants and palms him through his jeans. Blaine’s hips arch into the movement and he hisses at the pressure.

Kurt pulls away with another smirk that Blaine wants to kiss right off his mouth, “So I recall saying I wanted my cock somewhere in your body.” He pants.

Blaine blinks. They can’t have sex right now. Not only are they basically strangers to each other, they don’t have all the necessary supplies. Blaine’s got condoms in his bag (he has a boy scout ‘always be prepared’ approach to life) but no lube. 

“I don’t have lube.” He tells Kurt and the other man shrugs a creamy, pale shoulder.

“Doesn’t rule out all of the options.” He says, “And leaves something open for next time.”

Blaine honestly doesn’t know how he feels about the prospect of ‘next time’ but he’s too focussed on ‘this time’ to really give it much thought, “Condoms are in my bag. Front pocket.” He says, gesturing to the black overnight bag on the counter across the room.

Kurt gives one more squeeze to Blaine’s erection and then gracefully gets up to make his way over to Blaine’s bag. Blaine sits up on the couch and presses a hand to his flushed neck while he waits. His mouth waters as he watches Kurt make his way back over to him, jeans slung slightly low on his hips, revealing tantalizing hips bones Blaine wants to bite.

When Kurt is standing in front of him Blaine realizes biting Kurt’s hip bones is something he can actually do. He hooks one hand into the loops on Kurt’s jeans and other on his ass before dragging him the last little bit forward and attaching his mouth to the protruding bone. Kurt groans above him and places a hand on the back of Blaine’s head, not pressuring or positioning, just seeming to anchor himself.

When Blaine’s given what he thinks is sufficient, and yet not at all sufficient (his brain is already thinking about next time apparently), enough attention to Kurt’s hip bones, he makes short work of Kurt’s button and fly. He tugs down Kurt’s pants and boxer briefs to rest under his ass and licks his lips as Kurt’s erection pops free. It’s gorgeous, just like the rest of him.

He takes the condom Kurt offers him and quickly rolls it down the hard flesh. Kurt’s hips are canting back and forth just a tiny bit, probably unconsciously, and Blaine grabs his hips to still them before taking just the head of his cock in his mouth.

Kurt gasps above him and Blaine takes more into his mouth, sucking strongly as he pulls back. He bobs his head a few more times before bringing one hand to stroke the bottom of Kurt’s cock and focussing on the head. He flicks his tongue around the head (a little more strongly than he would without the condom) and while he may be a little out of practice, the noises Kurt is making are enough to spur him on.

Blaine’s not sure how long it takes but soon Kurt is grabbing at his wrist and the back of his head and groaning, “I’m close.”

Blaine doubles his efforts and within a minute Kurt is moaning out his release into the condom. Blaine smiles to himself as he gently strokes Kurt through his orgasm. It’s a good feeling.

Kurt sighs above him almost lazily but then tenses and looks down at Blaine with wide eyes. Blaine’s about to ask if he did something wrong before Kurt is kneeling in front of him and tugging Blaine out of his own pants.

“Don’t have time for a condom. Need to get you off.” He says as he wraps a hand around Blaine’s cock. Blaine gasps and leans back against the couch, even if he’s confused by Kurt’s urgency, “You were so hot.” Kurt says as he pumps Blaine’s erection in his hand with a singular focus, “Oh god I need to make you come.”

Blaine is swept up in Kurt’s urgency and far sooner than he expects his hips are pumping erratically into Kurt’s fist and he comes all over his jeans, stomach, and Kurt’s hand with a long drawn out moan.

He pants up at the ceiling afterwards, flashes of light still dancing in front of his eyes. He hears Kurt get up and figures he’s probably disposing of the condom. He then feel Kurt tap his hip. He looks up at him to find the other man looming over him with an expectant look, redressed with his shirt and all. Blaine stares dumbly up at him before Kurt is smirking and tapping his hip again, gesturing for Blaine to lift his hips. Blaine does so silently and watches as Kurt right his pants and then grabs his shirt and tugs it over Blaine’s head.

Kurt leans his hands on either side of Blaine’s head on the couch, a slow smile spread across his lips. He doesn’t say anything, and Blaine’s not sure he himself is capable of speech at the moment. Instead, Kurt leans in and presses a gentle kiss to Blaine’s lips. Blaine closes his eyes into the kiss but opens them again when Kurt pulls away.

The other man smiles again, winks, and then is gone - out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Blaine stares after him for a moment before letting his head drop back onto the couch again. Wow.

— — —

Blaine’s not sure why he’s expecting a dramatic shift in his relations with Kurt after their moment in his dressing room. He’s a bit of a hopeless romantic, sure, but he’s also got his feet firmly planted on the ground. Sometimes an orgasm really is just an orgasm. Kurt was about as safe a partner as Blaine could find. Not in the medical sense (though he has no reason to believe otherwise in that regard) but in the ‘he’s not going to blurt anything to the press’ kind of way. They’d both gotten off and it had been hot. Nothing has to change.

But that doesn’t mean he isn’t slightly stung when Kurt hands him his earpieces and microphone before the show that night without even a second glance. He drops the equipment in Blaine’s hands and by the time Blaine looks up from the pile to look at Kurt, Kurt is already off fiddling with Jeff’s battery pack.

Blaine watches Kurt flit around backstage while he puts his earpieces in and jumps when he feels a hand on his shoulder. He turns to find Wes smiling at him, one earpiece dangling down his shoulder while the other sits firmly in his left ear.

“Ready to put on a good show?” He asks with a smile. 

Performing gives them all a buzz, it’s why they do it, and as Blaine nods his answer he can see Nick bouncing on his toes across the small area they’re waiting in and David plucking an imaginary bass with fast fingers. Blaine can hear the hum of the crowd as they settle into their seats. It’s electrifying.

Wes usually comes to ask him if he’s ready and then will meander away to ask the same of the other men but this time he pauses, giving Blaine a calculating look that has Blaine looking at him with a quirked eyebrow.

“Something wrong?” Blaine asks.

Wes doesn’t answer, just looks over Blaine’s face and Blaine swallows thickly, “You got laid.” Wes says simply.

Blaine’s eyes widen, does he have a hickey?

“I’m sorry what?” He asks.

Wes rolls his eyes and then narrows them, “I’ve known you since you were fifteen. From the first time you told me Wallace Parin touched your dick all the way to when Marcus broke your heart. I, unfortunately, know what you look like after you’ve been…” Wes lets the sentence hang. Blaine’s not sure why saying ‘fucked’ in their current environment would be any worse than saying ‘touched your dick’, “So sometime between sound check and now...you had sex.”

Blaine swallows again and tries not to glance over in Kurt’s direction. He usually tells Wes everything but now is definitely not the time to talk about it and even confirming what Wes suspects will begin a line of questioning they don’t have time or privacy for.

Blaine shakes his head and coughs into his hands.

Wes’ eyes narrow further if that’s possible, “Who did you sleep with?”

“Everything all set?” Blaine jumps at Kurt’s voice and turns to find the other man standing in front of them. He’s looking at them with a cool expression and Blaine’s not sure if he heard their conversation. He’s sure Kurt heard at least some of it.

Blaine gives a jerky nod, “Uhh, yeah, yeah. Everything’s good to go.” He taps his ears and gives Kurt a thumbs up.

Kurt nods and looks at Wes, who mirrors Blaine’s thumb, before he’s once again gone. This time, leaving their little enclosure to undoubtedly make his way to the sound board at the back of the floor.

Blaine hopes Wes has forgotten their previous conversation but when he turns to the other man, Wes is smirking at him and Blaine has a sudden feeling that not only is the subject not dropped, Wes now knows more than he did before.

Unfortunately, or fortunately for Blaine, Wes doesn’t have time to comment before their stage manager, Clark, is gesturing for them to get into position. He turns away from his best friend and makes his way to the front of the area ready to step out from stage right. Wes takes the spot behind him but Blaine doesn’t look back.

The lights in the venue drop and Blaine takes a deep breath as the volume on the other side of the curtain in front of him increases tenfold. The screams and cheers are deafening even with his earpieces in and his blood sings with the energy of it.

This is what he was born to do. This is what he loves to do and he finds himself bouncing on his toes just like Nick was doing moments before as Clark pulls back the curtain and The Warblers take the stage.

— — —

Blaine is able to avoid Wes and his questions until they’re on the bus to their next stop (“Bismarck.” Wes informed them before telling them they should really start to pay attention to the schedule). David heads to his bunk right after the traditional shot of whiskey they all share after a show and Nick and Jeff are still so high on the performance that they giggle their way to the back of the bus (“Keep it down, you two!” David warns from his closed bunk).

Wes watches the couple go with a smile and fond roll of his eyes before turning to Blaine who, at this moment, wishes he was able to sleep this soon after a show. His heart rate may have dropped thanks to his after show ritual of leaning against a backstage wall of a venue and closing his eyes, but he’s still not tired.

Wes turns to look at him with the same smile he gave Jeff and Nick before it turns to more of a smirk, “So...Kurt.” He says.

Blaine sighs, “It just sort of...happened.”

“You’re not about to give me the whole ‘I tripped and fell on his dick’ excuse, are you?” Wes asks.

Blaine laughs and shakes his head, “No, it wasn’t an accident. But I was yelling at him about my mic from sound check…”

“Which you know wasn’t his fault, right?” Wes interrupts.

“Yeah, I know.” Blaine says, even if that had been his original assumption, “And then he basically said I could keep yelling or we could sleep together. I took option two.”

Wes hums thoughtfully, “So what happens now?”

“I don’t know.” Blaine shrugs, “We didn’t exactly cuddle and talk about our future afterwards. And he more or less ignored me at the show.”

“Is it something you’d want to pursue?” Wes asks.

Blaine sighs roughly, “I don’t know that either. Maybe? I mean, the sex was great. Like, really great.”

“I don’t need measurements.” Wes deadpans.

Blaine throws a throw pillow at him from the couch he’s sitting on. Wes catches it on the other couch and leaves it on his lap, “Anyway,” Blaine continues, “I don’t think he would want to.”

“You don’t think he would want to? Or you would want to?” Wes asks.

Blaine scrunches his face thoughtfully, “Both?” He says, “I mean, he’s been nothing but a dick to me, he probably hates me, and it’s not good to get into a relationship with someone you work with.”

Wes sighs, “Okay, first of all, I told you before he doesn’t hate you. He’s not overly nice to any of us. Has he ever been overtly mean?” Blaine shakes his head and Wes gestures toward him with a hand, “See? He’s not mean or hateful. He’s just...removed. And maybe there’s a good reason for that. We don’t know.” Blaine nods, thoughtfully, “And as for getting involved with someone you work with? It’s not like you suddenly started sleeping with David.”

“He couldn’t handle me.” They hear the muffled call from the bunk area of the bus and both turn with a laugh. A private conversation isn’t really a thing with the five of them, especially not on the tour bus. Blaine’s sure David has heard the whole conversation and that depending on how involved with each other they are at the moment Jeff and Nick have heard it too.

Wes sighs and leans forward to tap Blaine’s knee, “Look, I’m glad you had fun this afternoon. And maybe that’s all it’ll be. But my advice, that you didn’t ask for but I’m giving anyway, is that you talk to Kurt about it. Maybe this could turn into something.”

Blaine nods with a sigh. Talk to Kurt. Sounds so simple. If only Kurt would say more than two words to him at a time.

— — —

Blaine usually loves days off. They don’t have a show in Bismarck until tomorrow night and he usually loves to find something city-specific to do when he has free time.

Today, his head is too full and distracted to enjoy the city. He finds himself grabbing a coffee and going to the venue (Charlie, who he’s worked closely with for four years and has a good friendship with even though he technically works for Blaine, gives him a hard time for being a workaholic) just to walk around.

There is a basketball game that night and Blaine walks among the crew setting up for the event, making sure his credentials are fully displayed just in case someone wonders why he’s wandering around. They still probably wonder why he’s there, but they don’t question him and for a while he sits in a seat near the top of the bowl and watches a man buff the court.

He knows Charlie is around (probably a few rows behind him) but thankfully he doesn’t try to make conversation.

Blaine has no idea why Kurt’s got his head spinning so much. For all intents and purposes what they had could be classified as a one night stand (or a one afternoon stand…) and while Blaine hasn’t often partaken in that pastime, he has had a couple. Sure it may be a bit strange to work with Kurt afterwards, but like Wes said it’s not like he’d slept with one of his bandmates out of the blue. His professional interactions with Kurt are minimal when it comes to the face to face, so their getting off together really doesn’t have to affect anything.

It’s just that Blaine can’t get Kurt out of his head. He wishes he could, but he finds that Kurt is all he can think about. Whether he’s thinking about ways to make Kurt be more friendly, or thinking about Kurt’s hands or tongue on his body, his mind lands on Kurt related thoughts more often than it doesn’t.

He wonders what Kurt is doing today. Is he enjoying the sights of the city? Is he finding another companion to get close to (Blaine has an immediate negative reaction to that thought)? Or is he overthinking everything like Blaine? Can he not get Blaine off his mind?

Blaine shakes his head at that. Kurt doesn’t strike him as the type to overthink things or pine after someone. But that doesn’t stop Blaine from doing so with Kurt.

He sighs as he continues to watch the man buffing the floor (he’s now halfway done) and thinks this may not be a bad way to spend the day - staring down at a man just doing his job. Maybe Blaine will stay for the game tonight if they’ll let him. Empty his head of anything relating to his life.

A lot easier said than done…

— — —

The next afternoon, Blaine jogs down the stage stairs and toward the sound booth after sound check. He hasn’t said much to Kurt since getting to the venue and Kurt has been his usual aloof self, but Blaine had come to the decision last night that it would probably be best if they talked about what happened. Even if Kurt says that’s all he had wanted, at least Blaine would know.

“Hey!” He says, trying to sound upbeat as he hands Kurt his ear pieces and microphone, “Can we talk?”

Kurt makes brief eye contact with him before shrugging and handing the equipment to the assistant sound engineer to deal with. He follows Blaine back to his dressing room (this time a pale pink door with his name on the front printed on white computer paper) and once they’re inside Blaine spins to begin talking to find Kurt unbuttoning his shirt.

“I don’t have a lot of time.” Kurt is saying as Blaine stares at him, “We gotta make this quick.”

Blaine splutters as Kurt gets to the bottom of his shirt and lets it hang open over his undershirt as he brings a foot up to take his shoes off. Blaine just stares and when Kurt’s got his hands on his second shoe he stops and looks at Blaine with a quirked brow.

“Why aren’t you undressing?” Kurt asks.

Blaine swallows and finds his voice, “That’s...not really why I asked to talk to you.”

Kurt lets his foot drop with a soft thud on the carpet and stares blankly at Blaine, “Then what did you want to talk about?” He asks and Blaine gets a sudden feeling that even though Kurt asked for more information that he’s not particularly interested in hearing it.

“I…” Blaine starts, “I wanted to talk to you about what happened.”

Kurt shrugs, “We had sex. It was fun.”

End of story.

“So, that’s it?” Blaine asks.

Kurt furrows his brows, “I’m not...looking to date you.” He says, slowly, “If that’s what you’re after then maybe we should just leave it at that afternoon.”

Blaine tries not to feel offended at Kurt saying he’s not looking to date him. He had prepared for many different responses, Kurt not wanting to date being one of them, but he feels like he would have felt better if Kurt had left off the ‘you’ part of the sentence.

He nods after a moment, “I’m not looking to date you either.” He says.

Kurt nods too, but he’s still looking at Blaine with a wary expression, “Okay. Good. We’re on the same page.” He says and Blaine nods, “Are we going to still keep having fun?”

Blaine had thought his answer to that question would be no. He wasn’t going to be heartbroken if Kurt didn’t want to date him but to continue a purely sexual relationship? He wasn’t sure he has that in.

But now, looking at Kurt with one shoe off and his shirt undone, Blaine can’t remember why he thought continuing a purely sexual relationship was a bad thing. 

He nods again, still staring at Kurt’s chest, and can just see Kurt smirk from from above his line of sight before Kurt is advancing and pushing him back against the wall, connecting them in a kiss that leaves Blaine breathless from the start.

— — —

Having regular sex is awesome. Blaine knows that studies have shown the positive effects of regular sexual release with a partner, but he’s always surprised when it happens to him.

He’s more relaxed and yet more focussed than he’s been in a long time. He writes three new songs in the span of a weekend (one of which is written with Kurt asleep beside him) and bounces back from ‘show hangover’ quicker than usual.

He and Kurt meet up at least once every two days, though once they did manage to meet up and have a combined seven orgasms between them in the span of twenty-four hours (Blaine says that Kurt owes him one because Blaine lasted long enough for Kurt to get hard again after coming once).

The sex is fantastic. They advance to penetrative sex a week after starting their arrangement (once time and supplies were available to them) and now it’s a mixture of all manners of sex to get each other off. They perfect the art of the quick orgasm as they often meet up in Blaine’s dressing room after sound check but before Blaine is whisked away to another engagement. 

A few times there hasn’t been a soft surface in Blaine’s dressing room so they’ve had to resort to sex on one of the busses. Blaine always insists they go to Kurt’s bunk on the crew bus.

“Can I ask you something?” Kurt asks, one such time. They’re in Sacramento and Blaine feels like a cat in the sun as he stretches even though there is little direct light in the bunk area of the bus.

Blaine glances over at Kurt before answering. Kurt is stretched on his side next to Blaine (with his back to the wall of the bunk), head propped up on an upturned hand while he looks down at Blaine lying on his back in front of him. He seems just as relaxed as Blaine and Blaine marvels at the changes he’s seen in Kurt’s personality over their time ‘together’. He’s still aloof and standoffish most of the time but especially during these times, right after they’ve slept together, he’s open and joyful in a way Blaine wants to nurture.

“Sure.” He says, bringing an elbow up to rest under his head. His elbow hangs over the edge of the bunk (the bunks are barely big enough for one person left alone two fully grown men - even if Blaine is on the smaller side)

“Why do we never fuck in your bus?” Kurt asks, “I’m sure you’ve got your own king size bed and yet you always insist on doing it here.”

Blaine hums, “First of all, how come you haven’t brought this up until now? We’ve been doing this for almost two months.”

Kurt rolls his eyes and Blaine is instantly regretful of his remark, fearing Kurt will go back to being dismissive.

“Because whenever we make the decision I’m more interested in the orgasm then I am in the location.” Kurt answers with a smirk and Blaine inwardly sighs in relief.

“Ah.” He answers with his own smile, “Makes perfect sense. My second point though is...there is more privacy here. I don’t have a king size bed in the bus. We have bunks the same as you do and one or more of the guys is usually around.”

“Bullshit.” Kurt answers and there’s a bite to his voice.

Blaine shifts and looks at Kurt in surprise, “Why does that surprise you?”

“Because you’re one of the most popular bands in America right now. You could probably afford five individual busses at this point but you’re also the lead singer. I’m sure that garners special treatment.” Kurt explains.

Blaine pouts thoughtfully, “I’ve never seen it that way. We’re in this together. All five of us are equally important and it would get lonely being on a bus by myself. I like having the guys around.”

Kurt scoffs, “Can’t even be famous right.” He mumbles.

Blaine’s brow furrows, “Excuse me?”

Kurt sighs before pulling the curtain to the bunk open roughly and climbing over Blaine. He lands softly on the ground and starts to pick up the clothes they had left scattered, tossing Blaine his as he gets dressed himself.

“You have been given every opportunity and you act like nothing is different. You are FAMOUS, Blaine.” Kurt says.

“I’m aware of that.” Blaine says but Kurt isn’t really listening.

“You are famous and you should act like it.” Kurt continues.

Blaine hugs his jeans to his chest and looks at Kurt curiously, “How does one act famous?”

Kurt huffs, “I don’t know!” He shouts angrily.

“Kurt, I’m confused.” Blaine says, “You’re mad because I’m not being famous correctly but you don’t know how a famous person should act?”

Kurt stops putting his socks on and looks up at Blaine with blazing eyes. Blaine has seen Kurt aloof, in the throws of passion, and even relaxed and sort of sweet after their encounters. He’s never seen him angry.

“Of course I don’t.” He seethes, “I’m not the famous one.”

Kurt grabs his shoes from the ground and stalks off the bus in only his socks. Blaine is left blinking owlishly at the spot the other man just left. He’s confused and a little angry himself. What was Kurt going on about? There isn’t one way to be famous and there certainly isn’t one right way. Famous people are just regular people trying and sometimes fucking up but doing it all in the eyes of the public.

Blaine gets dressed slowly, his head still spinning, and exits the bus. He shields his eyes against the bright Sacramento sun but he becomes aware very quickly that it’s not only the sun he’s shielding his eyes from.

Flashbulbs are going off all around him and he blinks as they leave him temporarily blinded. People are shouting questions at him that he can’t really hear because they are layering on top of each other. The paps are here. Perfect timing. 

Normally, Blaine would be able to think of his own exit strategy but after the sex and his fight with Kurt his brain is a little slow. Luckily, Charlie swoops in and grabs him by the arm, more or less dragging him through the throng of people and into a waiting SUV on the street.

Blaine lands on the seat and immediately leans his head back against the headrest as Charlie gets into the driver’s seat, “Thanks.” Blaine says.

“I’m never far away.” Charlie says, looking at him through the rear view mirror. Blaine nods his thanks again. He knows Charlie knows he’s sleeping with Kurt, hell he’s sure half the tour knows it, but he’s even more grateful to Charlie for giving him and Kurt space while still being around.

Charlie pulls away from the curb and Blaine’s not even sure where they’re going. He can still see flashbulbs going off behind them as they drive away.

He sighs and lays his head back against the headrest, intent to try and slow his heart rate and let Charlie deal with the logistics. 

It’s a few moments later though that Charlie clears his throat from the front seat and Blaine picks his head up to look at him. Charlie is once again looking at him through the rear view mirror, his soft grey eyes holding a look of concern.

“I didn’t know whether to bring it up or not…” He says hesitantly and Blaine furrows his eyebrows. It’s been a while since Charlie felt like he couldn’t be open with Blaine about anything, “but ummmm did you get a chance to look in the mirror before you left the bus?”

Blaine furrows his brows further. What?

He tries to catch his reflection in the window but it doesn’t really show him much.

“Here.” Charlie says, before he’s pulling over and putting the car into park. He turns the rearview mirror so that it more faces Blaine and Blaine shifts to be able to look into it.

He’s instantly horrified.

He looks freshly fucked. And while yes, that’s exactly what he is, the tousled hair, flushed cheeks, and oh god hickeys are clear markers to anyone...including the paparazzi who just took about a million pictures of him...that he had just been sleeping with someone.

Charlie winces once he knows Blaine gets it.

Blaine knows that Kurt is wrong that there isn’t one right way to be famous...but this is definitely a WRONG way to be famous.

— — —

Blaine sits slumped in the conference room chair he’s in. It’s not often they have conference room meetings but back when they were younger and just starting out, conference room meetings were scheduled whenever any one of them stepped out of line and did something that could ruin the imagine of the band.

They happened a lot back then. They were still learning what wasn’t acceptable to do as humans let alone what was acceptable in the public eye. Blaine was the subject of fewer conference room meetings than his bandmates back then (Jeff is the reigning champion for most) but this one today, is all about him.

Clarissa, their publicist, sits at the head of the table. She’s got her head in her hands as she looks down at the papers in front of her. Blaine knows what those papers are. They are magazines (both credible and not so credible) reporting on ‘Blaine Anderson’s Tour Tryst’. Blaine hasn’t read or looked at a single one, but he knows they all say a variation of the same thing. ‘Illicit meetings’, ‘dating a crew member’, ‘is Kurt using Blaine to get a raise?’.

Blaine knows the paps don’t have Kurt’s name, or even any pictures of him, but they know (or at least heavily assume) it’s a crew member. Blaine looks around at his bandmates around the table and wonders why Kurt isn’t actually at this meeting. He’s sort of glad he isn’t.

“Look at you go, Blainers.” Jeff says, breaking the minutes long silence. Clarissa hasn’t even said anything yet, “Getting your very own scandal.”

“Sterling.” Clarissa says to the papers on the table, not lifting her head, “Shut. Up.”

Jeff, to his credit, does just that with a sheepish grin before Clarissa picks her head up and shakes it a couple of times, possibly to clear it.

“All right. So, this is what we’re going to do.” She says and doesn’t care to check if they’re paying attention, she knows they are. When Clarissa talks, you listen, “The four of you,” She gestures to Wes, David, Nick, and Jeff in turn (her finger and gaze lingering slightly longer on Jeff who looks at her innocently), “are going to keep your mouths shut. You have no comment on anything. At all. For the next little while.”

The four men nod their agreement. She nods at them before turning to Blaine.

“And you,” She says with a point, “are going to tell me who it is you’re sleeping with so he and I can have a little chat. Oh god,” Her eyes widen as she looks off into the distance and then at Blaine, “it IS a guy right? I don’t think I have it in me to deal with it being a woman.”

Blaine almost laughs, almost, “It’s a guy.” He says simply.

Clarissa nods and takes a deep breath, “Right. And then after you are doing an interview with Ellen where you will say that overall you have no comment.”

Blaine blinks at her before nodding. He has no problem with that. He doesn’t like the fact that at this point the whole tour knows he’s sleeping with Kurt, so he’s totally okay with the world not knowing.

Clarissa nods back at him and takes another deep breath. She’s been their publicist since the beginning so he’s seen her like this quite a bit (re: aforementioned plethora of conference room meetings when they were first starting out) but not for a while. Blaine really like Clarissa and he feels guilty for having put her through this, even if it is her job.

“Okay.” She says with a deep sigh, “Now, I have some questions for you, Blaine, about the nature of this relationship. Do you want the others here for that?”

Blaine swallows. It’s not like he’s a stranger to such conversations. He had one with Clarissa when he first started dating Marcus, but with Marcus Blaine had known exactly where they stood and could answer Clarissa’s questions no problem. With Kurt? Blaine’s not even sure if there’s still anything between them considering how they left things, but he’s also not sure how to classify their relationship to Clarissa. Fuck buddies doesn’t seem appropriate for a business meeting, but they aren’t even really friends with benefits because they aren’t really friends.

And why does Blaine feel like even if ‘fuck buddies’ was an appropriate term to use professionally...that it’s a lie?

Clarissa gives him an expectant head shake, her full head of auburn curls shaking with the movement, when he doesn’t answer and he shakes himself out of his thoughts to answer, “Ummm, you guys can go.” He says.

He gets weird looks from his friends but they don’t say anything as they leave. The five of them have no secrets from each other. Usually it wouldn’t have even been a question that they would stay for the whole meeting, but Blaine feels like he’s on shaky ground and the less people around to watch him tremble at the moment, the better.

Clarissa waits until the door is closed before pulling out her phone and opening her notes app, “All right, Blaine, first up: who is it?”

“Kurt Hummel.” Blaine says to the table in front of him.

Clarissa hums but otherwise doesn’t comment, she’s good at her job, “And how long has this been going on?”

“A little over two months.” Blaine answers. Another easy question. There is a definite timeline, if nothing else.

Clarissa makes a note and then looks back up to him, “Is it serious?”

Blaine lets out a crazed laugh at this that he wasn’t expecting. It’s more bark than anything else actually, and Clarissa gives him a strange look. 

Blaine wipes a hand over his mouth. Is it serious? No. That’s the answer he should give. But...ever since Kurt left the bus three days ago, Blaine’s head has been in a tailspin.

Kurt’s words had hurt and confused him and while they hadn’t really been fighting about their arrangement, Kurt leaving had felt to Blaine like a break up. He’d been thinking about it a lot since. How lately he’d done everything he could to make Kurt get that happy, relaxed expression on his face, and that how when he was able to do it outside of sex it was even more satisfying somehow. How, when Kurt wasn’t available or not around, like on free days, Blaine would think about him potentially being with someone else and it made him feel nauseous. How getting to see Kurt was the best part of his day, sex or no sex.

Blaine feels his palms begin to sweat as he goes over all it in his head again. He has feelings for Kurt. Feelings for Kurt that extend further than wanting to simply sleep with him.

Feelings for Kurt he’s now going to basically have to share with his publicist, after just realizing them, before he even shares them with Kurt - if he ever decides or gets to share them with Kurt.

He looks up at Clarissa, who is staring at him expectantly again, and blinks, “I don’t know.” He answers.

Clarissa nods, apparently this answer isn’t detrimental, “Okay, that’s a conversation we can have with Kurt.”

Blaine pulls ups short, “Woah, what?” Clarissa looks at him, confused, “We?” He says gesturing between himself and the publicist, “Are not going to have anything with Kurt.”

Clarissa rolls her eyes, “Well, of course, you two would be having the conversation. But it’s fairly simple. It’s just a question.”

Clarissa has a different view on the world, at least when it comes to her clients. Whatever’s easiest to get the simplest, cleanest message out there. She doesn’t seem to realize that it’s not just a simple question.

Blaine shakes his head, “Kurt and I aren’t even together.” He says and Clarissa’s head snaps up from where she had been typing on her phone.

“What?” She asks.

“We aren’t together. We are, or at least were, just sleeping together.” Blaine clarifies.

Clarissa shakes her head, “But you’re Blaine. You don’t do that.”

She’s right, he doesn’t do that....

“Well, that’s what we were doing. Or are doing. I don’t know. But it’s not a simple conversation.” He says.

Clarissa puts her hands to her head and massages her temples, “I can’t process this right now.”  _ Yeah, that makes two of us,  _ Blaine thinks but figures they are talking about slightly different things, “I need to talk to Kurt and make sure he knows the rules. You need to figure out what the fuck’s going on and tell me so I can spin this into something that doesn’t make you look like a manwhore.”

Blaine really likes Clarissa, but he sometimes wonders if she likes them very much.

“Call me.” She says and then she’s gone.

Blaine leans his head on the table in front of him when he’s alone. He hasn’t spoken to Kurt in three days, as per Clarissa’s instructions (he wasn’t allowed to really interact with any crew members before she could get to him), and he has a strong desire to see him and talk to him, as well as an equally strong desire to stay as far away from him as possible.

He doesn’t know what Kurt’s thinking or how he’s feeling and with Blaine’s new (or rather newly discovered) feelings he feels like a raw and exposed nerve. He feels like talking to Kurt will either soothe him or cause him to fray even more.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t have the luxury to think about that right now (though of course he still will). He has an interview to get ready for. At least he has a good relationship with Ellen Degerenes. That should work in his favour.

— — —

He and Kurt are put into a room together like bickering school children later that day.

Blaine still has makeup on from his interview, which had gone well enough in Blaine’s (and thankfully Clarissa’s) opinion. Ellen had been lovely as usual - she’d asked him about the tour, about the band, and then about the pictures.

“I have no comment about those.” Blaine had answer dutifully because he really doesn’t. It’s no one’s business but his and Kurt’s...it just so happens everyone else disagrees.

He and Kurt sit opposite each other in a room at the venue. It’s different from a conference room because there isn’t a large table and chairs but instead smaller clusters of couches, comfy chairs, ottomans, and small tables. Blaine’s not sure what this room could be used for but at least it doesn’t feel so formal as he and Kurt sit in comfy chairs with a small circular table between them.

They haven’t spoken since they entered the room almost ten minutes ago and they’ve made very little eye contact (which is why Blaine knows so much about the room - the couches have tiny red x’s stitched into them) but Blaine can  _ feel  _ Kurt. It’s like now that he realized he has feelings for the other man, Kurt has gotten into his every cell.

“So, Clarissa seems fun.” Kurt snarks, breaking the silence.

Blaine chuckles, “She’s intense but very good at her job.”

Kurt nods, “She told me I wasn’t allowed to tell anyone we were fucking.”

“Were you planning on it?” Blaine asks.

Kurt shrugs, “Not really. I mean my dad, but I tell my dad everything and he’s not really one to go blabbing stuff around, especially not about his son’s relationships.”

Blaine feels a pull in his chest at the word ‘relationships’ but tries to tamp it down. It’s a word that describes a lot of different situations. He tells his overexcited heart to calm the fuck down.

“Fame isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.” Blaine says, next. He’s not sure if he’s acknowledging Kurt’s understanding that any romantic relationship Blaine may get into has to be treated differently than a non-famous person, or if he’s calling back to their fight but whichever it is it causes Kurt to scowl.

“I don’t need lessons on fame from you.” He bites.

Blaine sighs, “I wasn’t trying to give you a lesson on fame.” He says.

Kurt recrosses his leg even tighter over the other and crosses his arms, “Not everyone wants to be famous.” He says, not making eye contact.

“I didn’t say everyone does.” Blaine defends.

“Some people are very happy with the simple non-famous lives they are living.” Kurt continues.

“I know that.” Blaine says and he’s suddenly very confused about the conversation they’re having. They’re supposed to be talking about their arrangement. Figuring out what it all is so Clarissa can get ahead of any story. But that’s not what they’re talking about at all.

Kurt pouts thoughtfully at him and Blaine can see the same blaze in his eyes that he saw on the bus. It’s so different from Kurt’s detached, aloofness and his relaxed happiness. It’s a force. A force to be reckoned with.

While Blaine doesn’t necessarily like that that blaze is directing ire at him...he does actually prefer it to the aloofness.

“What’s going on?” Blaine asks.

Kurt narrows his eyes at him as if trying to figure out the question. Blaine himself isn’t sure exactly what he meant by the question, but he has a feeling that however Kurt chooses to interpret it is important.

Finally, Kurt licks his lips and looks up at the ceiling for a second. When he brings his gaze back down to look at him, Blaine can see tears glistening in his eyes. His heart lurches in his chest but he stays still and quiet.

“I resent you.” Kurt whispers, roughly. Blaine’s eyes widen in surprise but he doesn’t say anything and lets Kurt continue, “Not just you but...anyone who has fame. *I* want fame.” The blaze is back but it’s watery behind Kurt’s tears. He rolls his eyes and wipes under them with a rough hand, “I am talented and driven and so fabulous, and yet no one sees it.”

Blaine wants to say that he sees it, but he doesn’t think Kurt would appreciate the comment at the moment and he also doesn’t really know if Kurt has talent beyond sound engineering and fucking. And somehow he thinks Kurt wants fame for things other than that.

“No one’s ever seen it.” He whispers to himself with a far off look on his face. Blaine has a desire to know what, or who, Kurt is thinking about right now but Kurt continues, “So I went into sound engineering.” He shrugs and a hint of the aloofness is back with a flick of his hair, “I’m good at it, hell I’m great at it, and it lets me taste the dream I’ve had since I was five. But...I resent the bands. All of them. So, in order to keep my job and not do something stupid, I stay detached. It’s easier. And then you come along.”

Blaine instantly feels, with that sentence, that he did something wrong simply by being in the band that employed Kurt.

“I thought I could remain detached and still have you,” Blaine’s heart leaps at the phrase ‘have you’, “but then you made me feel things, and it all came up to the surface.”

Blaine feels his mouth go dry and his heart soars with hope, “I made you feel things?”

“Not all of them were good things.” Kurt says and Blaine pulls up short, “But most of them were. But with the good comes the bad, and all that resentment I was able to suppress for so long came out. And then you went and got yourself photographed looking thoroughly fucked…”

“I had been.” Blaine says in a shocked whisper.

Kurt rolls his eyes but there’s no bite to it, “Yes, well, sound engineering isn’t the only thing I do well.”

This makes Blaine laugh and some of the tension in the room dissipates as Kurt chuckles with him. The tension settles back in however as Kurt levels him with a stare that makes Blaine go quiet.

“What I’m trying to say is…” Kurt continues, “I have a lot of feelings and trying to deal with them in this current situation is kind of unbearable.”

Blaine nods, “I get that.” He does, if he didn’t have to deal with all this he wouldn’t. But does that mean Kurt’s going to leave? Leaving would probably solve a lot of their problems (and make Clarissa’s life easier) except for the bruise it would leave on Blaine’s heart.

“I need to ask you something.” The phrase is so similar to the one that had started this strange series of events that Blaine is almost afraid to let him ask it. He nods anyway to let Kurt know he can continue, “And your answer will sort of make up my mind on a lot of things.” Blaine nods again. No pressure. Great. Kurt takes a deep breath, “Clarissa told me what you were going to say on Ellen today and I need to know if it’s true.”

Blaine casts his mind back to the talking points Clarissa had given him and tries to pinpoint which one Kurt is asking about. There wasn’t much that had to do with Kurt and most of it he answered with some version of ‘no comment’ except…

_ “So, Blaine Anderson,” Ellen had said in that way of hers that makes the audience scream because they know she’s going to ask something scandalous, “Are you currently in a relationship?” _

_ The audience screamed again and then went silent as Blaine chuckled and smiled, “No, Ellen, I am not currently in a relationship.” _

Blaine looks at Kurt to find the other man looking at him with a guarded expression. He knows the answer he’d like to give, and the answer he probably should give. His mind wars with the two before he settles on something in between, “I think I don’t want it to be true.”

Kurt takes a shaky breath in and exhales just as shakily before giving Blaine a trembling smile. Blaine feels his heart speed up in his chest, “Good answer.” Kurt breathes and then he’s laughing. It’s a happy laugh and Blaine feels his face light up at the sound.

Eventually, Kurt quiets down and takes another deep breath in before looking at Blaine, “I still have a lot of negative feelings.” He says.

Blaine nods, “I understand. But…” He starts and Kurt looks up at him when he pauses, “I’d love to, if you’d let me, talk to you about them and see if we can work them out.”

Kurt licks his lips and gives Blaine a small smile, “I think I’d like that.”

They are quiet for a while, just looking at each other with small smiles before Blaine ducks his head shyly, “So...what does this mean?”

Kurt nods like he figured this question was coming. He sits up a little straighter and a little bit of that blaze is back, but this time it’s not negatively directed at Blaine, “It means we continue fucking.” He says seriously and Blaine blinks at him, “But that we do it while dating.”

Blaine laughs and nods, “I like that. Fucking while dating.”

Kurt shrugs, “Or, you know, after dating, before dating. The precise timeline for fucking is flexible but...there will be dating.”

“There will be dating.” Blaine repeats and the pair smile at each other again, “Can I kiss you?” Blaine asks.

Kurt bites his lip around a smile and nods. They meet in the middle, over the small table between them, and Blaine cups Kurt’s face to bring it towards himself. It’s a lot different than their first kiss, or really any of the other kisses they’ve shared since starting this whole thing. It feels lighter than all the others, but not in intensity just in general mood. It’s so light that they both end up chuckling into the kiss for no particular reason and soon it’s more a press of teeth as they laugh.

“Have you killed each other yet?” They pull apart as the door opens and Clarissa walks in without knocking, “Oh!” She pulls up short when she sees them, eyes wide before they narrow and she points at them with the hand currently clutching her phone, “Is this distraction kissing or ‘we’re together’ kissing because I’m okay with the latter but not the former.”

Blaine chuckles and looks at Kurt who shrugs, “‘We’re together’ kissing.” Blaine answers with a smile at Kurt.

Clarissa smiles at him fondly, clutching her phone to her chest for a brief moment before her face hardens and she points at them again, “This I can work with, but we need to have a meeting to go over more specific logistics, and for the love of God Blaine, at least for the time being, cool it on the hickeys.”

“Tell him that.” Blaine says, gesturing to Kurt who smacks him up the side of the head. Blaine chuckles and dodges any further attacks as Kurt gives him another bit lip smile (which are definitely becoming one of Blaine’s favourite sights).

Clarissa rolls her eyes, “All right, out you get. I need this room and you have a show to get ready for.” She says that to both of them and they nod, getting up out of their seats.

As they pass, Clarissa nudges Blaine’s shoulder with her own and when he looks over she’s smiling at him again. He smiles back before following Kurt out of the room.

— — —

Dating and sleeping with Kurt is even better than just sleeping with Kurt. After that afternoon, Kurt lets the aloofness drop and becomes more open with his emotions. They aren’t always pleasant emotions, but no one’s emotions are always pleasant.

They are used to being careful in terms of sleeping together, but finding covert ways to go out on dates is hard. Luckily it won’t have to be for long. Clarissa told them that once there is some distance between them and the paparazzi pictures from that morning, they can slowly start to release their relationship to the media.

Blaine knows it’s a steep learning curve for Kurt, how to be in a relationship with a famous person, but Blaine doesn’t bring overt attention to that. He knows Kurt can handle himself and he also knows Kurt wouldn’t appreciate the reminder of just how famous Blaine is.

“Come on.” Blaine whines one night after a show two weeks later as he and Kurt walk out to the busses, hands brushing subtly as they walk, “At least come in for a while. You don’t have to ride with us, even though I want you to, but just hang out with us.”

Kurt shakes his head, “No, that’s your bus. You never have crew on your bus after a show. It’s always you five.”

“But you’re not just crew.” Blaine says, stopping Kurt when they get behind one of the crew busses and leaning in to kiss him against it.

Kurt lets himself be kissed for a second before he pushes Blaine away gently, “Maybe not to you, but to them I am.”

Blaine shakes his head. He just wants Kurt around. He’s riding his usual after show high and right now he sort of just wants to...touch Kurt and be around Kurt and be surrounded by Kurt. He feels a little drunk to be honest even though he hasn’t touched a drop of alcohol.

“They don't. I promise.” He says but Kurt rolls his eyes. Blaine huffs, “Then I’ll come hang out in the crew bus.”

Kurt scoffs, “Hard pass. I already get enough shit for dating the talent. Don’t want to add fuel to the fire.”

Blaine pouts, he’s losing his high, “Fine.” He says, “Go back to your bus. I’ll go to mine. When you get over yourself, I’ll be here.”

He stalks away and into the dark entryway of his bus. He can hear the boys joking and laughing, and usually that fills him with happiness, but tonight he wants to be with Kurt. He wants Kurt to follow him and say he’s sorry for being difficult and that of course he’ll spend the evening with them.

He doesn’t though and Blaine makes his way into the brighter lit main area of the bus.

“Blaine!” Jeff enthuses from his spot leaning sideways against Nick, “It’s time for our shot.”

“This one was getting antsy.” Nick comments.

“He wouldn’t shut up about the fact that you weren’t here.” David says from his spot across from them.

“Sorry.” Blaine says simply, sitting down between Wes and David.

“Where’s Kurt?” Wes asks, conversationally, as Jeff pours their shot of whiskey.

Blaine shrugs, “On the crew bus.” He says, accepting his glass.

They take their shot and Blaine enjoys the burn of the alcohol down his throat and the feeling of tradition. He wishes Kurt had come with him but he’s happy here too.

The five split off into different activities after that. Nick and Jeff start whispering and David pulls out his phone to undoubtedly play Candy Crush. Wes, meanwhile, puts an arm around Blaine shoulders and pats one.

“You happy, Blaine?” He asks.

Blaine nods, despite the strangeness of the conversation outside, “Yeah, I am. You?”

Wes nods, “I am.”

Blaine nods back at him and they smile at each other until Blaine sees movement behind Wes’ head. He shifts his gaze to find Kurt standing at the entrance to the main area of the bus. He looks simultaneously nervous and determined and Blaine’s heart speeds up.

“Hey.” He says, getting up and leaving Wes on the couch. 

“Hey.” Kurt says, “I’m sorry.” He sighs, “I wanted to spend time with you too but...my lovely hangups got in the way.” He makes a joke of it but Blaine can tell he’s sincere.

“I told you I understand. As long as you talk to me about it.” Blaine says.

Kurt nods, “I’m trying.”

Blaine can see that. He smiles encouragingly at Kurt and holds his hand out. Kurt takes it and the pair make their way further into the bus. They sit side by side on the opposite couch from Wes and the other man smiles at them, “Good of you to join us, Kurt.” He says.

Kurt nods and smiles, “Thanks.”

“I’m not going to get any sleep tonight, am I.” David says, it’s not a question, “With the four of you.” He gestures between Nick and Jeff and Blaine and Kurt.

Jeff giggles while Nick and Blaine roll their eyes, and Kurt looks vaguely shocked, “You love it, David.” Jeff says and David rolls his eyes.

“Well, I think I’ll go try to get to sleep now so I can try and sleep through the noise.” David says and slaps hands with all four members of the band before smiling at Kurt, “Night Kurt.”

“Night.” Kurt says, softly.

The others stay up for a little while longer. They talk, they joke, and eventually Kurt obviously feels comfortable enough to lean into Blaine’s side. Blaine’s heart leaps and he subtly moves his hand onto Kurt’s thigh. Kurt grabs his hand in both of his and holds it there.

They sit that way until the other three head off to bed (Wes reminds Nick and Jeff to keep it down) and then Kurt picks his head up, “I can see why you’d want to be on a bus with them.” He says.

Blaine smiles, “It’s a brotherhood. A bus of my own would be so lonely. The option has been offered to me more than once, though.”

Kurt sighs, “You’re such a good person.”

Blaine laughs softly, “I try? But as far as the fame goes?” He shrugs, “My original goal was to make art and help people. Being famous means I can do both.”

Kurt purses his lips, “Maybe that’s why people like you should become famous and people like me shouldn’t.” Blaine tilts his head curiously, “I totally would have taken the solo bus.”

Blaine chuckles, “You are only twenty-five, Kurt. Your chance to become famous is far from over.”

Kurt shrugs, “Maybe. But I think right now I’m happy where I am.”

Blaine looks into Kurt’s eyes and sees sincerity, mixed with the blaze that never really goes away now-a-days. But Blaine has come to LOVE it, hell, he’s come to love Kurt.

His breath catches at the thought. He loves Kurt.

“I love you.” He whispers without consciously deciding to say it outloud.

Kurt blinks at him and is quiet for a long moment. Blaine thinks he should feel nervous about Kurt’s reaction, or maybe upset that he hasn’t responded, but instead he feels content to have said it (even if that compulsion was only seconds old when he followed it).

He smiles softly at Kurt and leans his head against the back of couch, “You don’t have to…”

“I love you, too.” Kurt interrupts and Blaine can feel his face split into an ear-to-ear grin.

Kurt gives him his favourite bit lip smile and they stare at each other, sappily in love.

“Oh just get on with it. You can’t NOT sleep together after that.” David calls from the back of the bus.

Kurt and Blaine turn to look back at the dark space and burst out laughing simultaneously.

“No privacy.” Blaine says with a shrug.

Kurt licks his lips and grabs Blaine’s hand, pulling him to his feet and kissing him briefly before pulling away, “Then let’s give them a show.”

Blaine loses his breath as he stares into Kurt’s eyes. Kurt smirks at him before tilting his head back to the bunks. Blaine snaps out of his stupor before nodding and letting Kurt lead him back to his bunk.


End file.
